I have learned countless invaluable lessons through four decades of aviation experience and 22,000 hours of flying experience, which have included training and building teams daily for both regular and emergency operations, internationally and domestically.

Here are six lessons I believe can be transferred over to the business world that will help propel leaders to become highly effective. The most important lesson I’ve learned along the way is to give your crew – and staff – a reason to respect and follow you, because when times are tough, they are the ones that can truly help you navigate a storm.

1. Power or authority versus influence – and the winner is?

The truth is we only have power or authority by virtue of a role or title. We soon find out how good a job we’ve done when we no longer have that power, that is when we leave or retire. If we didn’t treat others well or with respect during our tenure, those team members won’t give us the time of day when we pass them in the street. We shouldn’t be surprised.

We will have earned that disrespect. On the other hand, if we have conducted ourselves well, we’ll have something much more valuable, and that’s influence – and influence is permanent. When we have influence, our team will follow us, speak up and tell us what’s really going on. And we won’t even need a title.

2. Be in the trenches. There is no substitute.

“Thank you for always having our back,” were the words that meant the most to me when I retired, and they were written by the most junior of our crew.

If you can make whatever is happening in your team affect you as well, you will earn lifelong respect.

Yes, of course we have to strategize, represent, make direction and executive decisions but we also need to lead from within as much as possible. Far from lessening our status or standing, it will rise immeasurably. If you can shallow the managerial gradient, your crew – your staff – will follow you.

3. Specialist skills or knowledge reign.

In the flight deck, I want every piece of information I can get, and from anyone, anytime. I want my crew to know that they can bring absolutely anything to my attention, no matter how small, if it concerns them. They are the experts in their area, not me. It’s that straightforward and that crucial.

‘Leading’ using a strict hierarchical approach, a dominant management gradient or by force, ultimately just does not work. At best, we will receive their minimum standard of performance – just enough to keep them ‘safe’, although we won’t know it.

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They won’t speak up. We won’t know what ‘top’ performance really is. We’ll never have received it. We cannot mandate it.  Most worrisome is that we don’t know the risk we may be carrying – the latent kind – the worst – and in critical situations, such an approach can actually be dangerous, or at least, seriously costly.

4. We can’t make a team by calling it one.

In fact, doing so can permanently extinguish any chance of creating one. We have to earn the right to build and lead a team. Many times I’ve seen emails that start with ‘Hi team,’ when in fact the individual doesn’t feel part of a team at all.

We cannot force a team yet we need them – be they sporting teams, crews or staff. Sometimes we call them teams but they’re really not. They are teams in name only, and a platitude.

A true team is one to which people have a sense of belonging and commitment. Achieve it and there is no downside and a huge upside. Ensure you have a real team before you call it one. Build a community, the ultimate team. And start with, ‘Hi everyone’ or similar. ‘Team’ comes later.

5. If someone in your team is affecting you, it tells you more about you than them.

It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re wrong. It may mean you’ve reached your limit with this person, the type of person or the issue – or it may mean you’ve just reached your limit for anything right now.

It’s probably time to hand over to someone else for a while. Maybe it’s time to seek assistance yourself.

6. You’re having extreme difficulty with someone, but you need them to play their part in the team

Overtly acknowledge someone else’s right to their view, even if it’s obnoxious to you. Doing so is the first step to them potentially agreeing with you or at least being able to work with you. They will feel at least respected by you enough to try to work through things.

Who knows, they may even start to like you. This can be incredibly hard, but it works, and fast. The really big negotiators flying around the world do this. They want – no, need – a result.

And remember, with intractability, sometimes the answer is there is no answer. The answer is you keep talking. That is the answer.