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Navigating through life’s big changes profoundly shapes who we are as people, both in and out of work. Here’s how to develop your leadership style as you develop as a person.

Are you the same person today as you were on your first day in the workforce?

Leadership is a role marked by continuous evolution, both professionally and personally.

The most effective leaders recognize and adapt to these transformations, understanding that shifts in identity – whether through career progression, personal milestones or societal changes – profoundly impact how they lead.

Evolving as a Leader

When we start out in the workforce, we’re focused on earning our stripes and becoming subject matter experts.

Progression into mid-level management, sees the focus shift from individual contributions to managing teams and projects. This phase requires the cultivation of new skills such as delegation, team-building and conflict resolution. The shift from ‘doing’ to ‘leading’ can be jarring, and often requires a reevaluation of your professional identity and who you are at work.

Senior leadership introduces another profound shift, often marked by loneliness and the heavy pressure of having to make pivotal decisions. The expectation to have all the answers can be overwhelming, fostering self-doubt and the need for continuous self-reflection and growth.

Relying on external success markers might set you up for feelings of failure.

If you’ve aligned your identity with your professional progression, then these feelings of success might be shifting as you cope with the pressures outside of work. Relying on external success markers might set you up for feelings of failure.

It’s at this stage that the ability to navigate identity changes becomes crucial in order to successfully lead others while also accepting your new professional identity.

Personal Identity Milestones

None of us are leading in isolation from the events happening in our lives outside of work. Whether it’s becoming a parent, caring for a family member or dealing with health challenges, these experiences can significantly impact your approach to leadership.

For example, a few years ago I led a research project interviewing leaders, and found that parenthood was a key personal identity milestone that leaders pointed to as having a profound impact on their leadership style and skills.

They pointed out that becoming a parent had enhanced their leadership by helping them develop their empathy, adaptability and ability to prioritize. But it of course also came with a huge increase in the demands on them outside of work, and made them reevaluate what mattered most to them.

Understanding your Internal Compass

So how can we navigate personal changes and challenges alongside leading others successfully?

Having an internal compass and understanding what really matters to you most at your very core means you have a North Star guiding you as you navigate change. Self-knowledge and self-awareness, leads to self-compassion and ultimately, self-acceptance.

This internal guide means you can examine your feelings and challenges along the path of leadership, through a lens of awareness. It means you can acknowledge frustrations and disappointment, identify setbacks and stay true to yourself as you navigate changes in your professional and personal life.

By integrating these personal experiences into your professional life they become strengths, rather than distractions.

If you’re going through big changes outside of work, then by integrating these personal experiences into your professional life they become strengths, rather than distractions.

As a leader, if you can acknowledge the personal identity shifts you’re dealing with, it also helps you become more compassionate toward the people you’re leading, who might also be going through big changes in their own personal or professional identities.

A Framework for Change

Successfully navigating change can be hard, but the practical CAAP tool (curiosity, acceptance, ask, prioritize) provides a practical framework for change.

It begins with curiosity and a willingness to evolve, rather than sticking with the status quo.

Curiosity: Adopt a mindset of curiosity. Notice and reflect on your experiences and emotions without judgment. This helps in understanding the underlying reasons behind your reactions and behaviors.

Acceptance: Accept your current reality, including your context, choices and behaviors. Acceptance does not mean approval but rather a recognition of the present moment, allowing you to redirect energy toward navigating through it rather than resisting it.

Ask: Engage with your team and peers by asking questions rather than making assumptions. The three powerful words, ‘Help me understand’ can foster better communication and understanding, ensuring that you address the actual needs and concerns of your team.

Prioritize: Identify and prioritize what matters most to you. This internal compass helps in making decisions aligned with your core values and goals, leading to more authentic and effective leadership.

This CAAP framework provides a robust tool for navigating these changes, helping you remain grounded, empathetic and effective. It can be applied to any type of change, whether a major identity shift, a conversation with one of your team members or can be an effective framework for projects and meetings.

It’s also helpful in your life outside of work – in understanding your family dynamics, helping your kids as they grow and change, or in communicating within your relationships.

Navigating your Changing Identity

The path of change can be messy and complicated – it’s rarely linear or without its challenges. But leaders who lean into and embrace these changes not only enhance their personal growth but also inspire and support their teams through similar transitions.

None of us stays exactly the same throughout our professional and personal lives, and who would want to?

CEOs and senior leaders who acknowledge and adapt to these identity shifts are ultimately better equipped to lead in an ever-evolving business landscape, as they are flexible enough to respond to changing priorities, while also steadied by their internal compass.

Understanding who you are and what matters to you most will ultimately help you adapt to your changing identities throughout your career and help you support those around you better. Because none of us stays exactly the same throughout our professional and personal lives, and who would want to?

Danielle Dobson

Contributor Collective Member

Danielle Dobson is the Founder of Code Conversations and the author of ‘Breaking the Gender Code’. She supports leaders in business, HR, DE&I and wellbeing as an advisor to help them attract, engage and develop talented people. Her work is empowering leadership at the individual level to shift leaders out of burnout and decision fatigue in times of challenge and change. As a speaker, Danielle helps people break free of the Gender Code and create their own Success Code. Her events are an inclusive, engaging and practical way to explore inclusion in the workplace. For more information visit https://www.codeconversations.com.au/

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